The dating game – at least the online version – is about to be over. We will not even make it to the middle of the alphabet, let alone the end. My subscription is expiring in a few days and I will not be renewing. I’d rather curl up with a good novel or go out with existing friends than continue with the frustrations this venture brings. Bye bye, book deal.
Guy F – from our last post – never actually materialized. After some lengthy and interesting phone conversation, we mutually decided we were not a great match. Cool.
Guy G – was good. You remember him – the mysterious blue-eyed snowbird. We enjoyed a Spring Training game last week. How best to describe him? Sweet, attentive, intelligent, kind, and successful. Why only good and not great? What’s the catch? I didn’t find him physically attractive. I believe there should be chemistry and sparks and a little heart racing, and there just wasn’t.
Note: Some say it’s okay to dismiss the lack of spark if his bank account is fat enough. Some say a sugar daddy is what I need. I disagree.
When the game was over we chatted and I confessed that I just didn’t feel like we would go beyond a friendship. He said okay, no problem, and gently insisted on taking me to dinner. He was so kind and pleasant, and I made it clear that I did not want to hurt his feelings or create false expectations. He agreed – we would just enjoy a nice meal and each others company and so we did. It was lovely and we parted with a somewhat awkward hug.
I am racking my brain to think of someone who may be a good match for him, because he’s a genuinely great guy. As my friend Susan says, there’s a lid for every pot. He mentioned several fun things to do, so it’s possible that we would connect before he migrates north. Again, clearly stated up front intentions will be paramount. I don’t want to be a heart breaker.
And our next contestant is the one that has me questioning my participation in this whole damn thing.
Guy H – as in – what the hell? We met for a late dinner on Saturday night and honestly, I was not thinking. I was tired, too relaxed and blew past several red flags along the way. When did I realize I may be in trouble? When he had a firm grip around my waist and an overly passionate lip lock on my face. I agreed to see him again – only so I could get in my car and send him the rejection message from a safe distance. The last thing I wanted to do was piss him off. Not good.
Perhaps I’m being paranoid and dramatic, perhaps not. Ladies & gents, watch yourselves out there. It’s the last time I’ll do a late dinner like that. There were not enough people around in the semi-lit parking lot and I was feeling unsafe for sure. Girls – and guys too – pay attention to the red flags. Don’t have too much to drink and let your guard down (thankfully I only had one drink). Make sure someone knows where you’re going and ask them to check on you at a specific time. I totally forgot about having someone check on me, which would have provided a smoother escape.
All of this is a learning process. I’m grateful this lesson didn’t cost more.
Two dates, two different guys, neither of them a match but they both liked me and wanted to continue. It’s an ego boost, but also exhausting. Learning to say “no thanks” is a valuable skill that I’ve gotten to exercise.
There was a bright spot this weekend which will be saved for another post, another day. What I will tell you is that it’s really good to have friends to balance out the challenges and disappointments dating can bring. I am one grateful girl…
Thanks for reading, until next time.