Let’s begin by simply saying that it’s okay when plans change. For example, I was going to blog about my recent adventures in pottery class.
Instead, I’m writing about reality, and that it’s perfectly okay to cry.
That’s what happened a week ago when I unpacked my suitcase. That I had packed on Thursday night, prepping for a Friday morning flight to see the world’s cutest baby. The same trip that I felt I could not take when I awoke in a near panic about going.
This was the trip I booked in January because saying good-bye to my people and
their my baby just wrecked me. I had to buy a ticket immediately, and I did.
But I didn’t use it. I was afraid, and whether it was rational or not, I could not force myself to get up and go. It was paralyzing and gut-wrenching and awful. Still, it felt like the right decision at the time for me.
This week, I’ve had family nearby – they live 1300 miles away – and right now they are less than an hour away. As the news has unfolded this week, it was decided that we would not see each other. Fear and worry win again. More disappointment, but also, it’s understood.
I cannot force myself – or others – to feel comfortable.
And let’s refrain from judgment here please.
My daughter who has spent hours – and lots of hard earned dollars – booking an extended trip to Europe this summer is having to cancel the whole thing. Without much being refunded or credited back. Even if it did become safe to travel by then, she won’t have any funds as her job is shutting down starting tomorrow.
No one can really plan for anything. And we are all disappointed. And it’s okay to mourn and grieve for a bit. Our plans and our world is changing faster than we can comprehend.
However, fretting about life in a month or two or six won’t really help any of us. Worry is like sitting in a rocking chair. It gives you something to do, but doesn’t get you anywhere.
There are many things for which to be grateful. So far we are all healthy and have food and shelter. As of this writing, I do not know a single person who has been diagnosed with COVID-19. It’s sunny and bright, and I’ve been able to work from home in my yoga pants.
I am choosing to take things one day at a time. Where is my hope? Where is my joy? It’s never in my circumstances. I know that God is bigger than all of this, and He/She has always provided for my needs and the needs of my family. Every single time, no exceptions.
So what can we do? Turn off the news. Breath in, breath out. Watch fun dancing videos. (yes I was in an REM tunnel). Go outside. Make art or do a puzzle if you can’t go outside. Reach out to your friends with positivity. Go to bed early. Binge on Netflix. Say a prayer. Check on your neighbors. Drink lots of water (or wine if you have some!). Find what feels good. Stay in the moment. Repeat often!
Thanks for reading, hang in there! Until next time,