Before we dive into the details, let’s define this term, shall we?
Solo-cation: noun. A hybrid of two words, solo and vacation; when a single person travels for a time of leisure and relaxation, and does it without any companions.
Nine total days away, by myself, as I ventured off to an adorable cabin in beautiful North Carolina. Two of those days were travel days (10 hour drive each way) and the other seven?
It was a mixed bag. There were a few things that didn’t go quite as planned. A handsome man had been penciled in for part of that time (and when it’s in pencil, you know what that means). And then a bestie was to fly up for a few days. But then a little thing called Hurricane Ian cancelled all flights coming out of FL, so I was on my own the entire time.
Side note: it’s very bizarre to have had my vacation while my people were dealing with a catastrophic event. I checked in frequently, offered to come back early, etc, but was assured they were fine. And thank you Jesus, they were. Sarasota seems to be the lucky spot when it comes to hurricanes- again.
So, what did this sometimes over-functioning, highly social, extrovert do for all that time – all by myself?
Read books. Went on hikes. Went shopping. Did yoga. Visited art galleries. Watched movies. Watched the weather channel (not too much). Laid around like a slug. Watched deer play in the back yard. Waited for hummingbirds (which scared me at first because this Florida girl thought it was a giant bug at first!). Watched the clouds from the back yard hammock. Built and enjoyed a bonfire. Wrote letters of forgiveness. Put together a puzzle. Meditated. Took long hot baths. Rested.
It was an amazing time overall. I actually lost track of time. Wasn’t sure what day it was frequently. It was glorious to check out from the normal routine. And so, what did I learn?
Three key takeaways: first, down time is something I really need. Short doses on a regular basis where I unplug and checkout. I’m putting a big X on my calendar at least once a week where I am unavailable. Three hours minimum. This is harder than I imagined, but necessary. I was so relaxed and at peace – and I need more of that!
Second, I really enjoy my own company! I know how to entertain myself. I wasn’t feeling bored, or crabby, or even lost. I would just think, what do I feel like doing? What made sense weather- wise? How far did I want to drive if I felt like heading out? And then I made a plan and executed. There were a few days where I never left the cabin, didn’t even change out of my yoga clothes. These were my favorites. No bra, no makeup, no agenda. Divine.
Last but certainly not least, I would like a partner. This is a little hard to admit because partnerships are tricky for someone as independent as I am. But I’m willing to explore the possibilities. I’ve been single for over a year and it would be nice to have a playmate.
I’ve learned a lot about myself and what I need and what I want. I also have nothing at stake, and no clock is ticking (my heart goes out to the singles wanting a family – that’s rough). I also have confidence in my ability to choose more wisely. Not settling for anyone less than amazing! And I plan to enjoy the process. Who might I meet? What new experiences might I enjoy? That’s for another post on another day.
The point of this post was to share about the life changing trip to North Carolina. With that, if you are also single, may I recommend a solo-cation? Get away on your own for a bit. See who you are and what works for you, without relying on anyone to entertain you or distract you. Mine was an amazing time of self discovery, and I’ll bet yours will be as well.
Thanks for reading.
Until next time,